


Escape Velocity

by minamoto (ewidentnie)



Series: we go forward. [2]
Category: NewS (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Robots & Androids, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-21
Updated: 2015-08-21
Packaged: 2018-04-14 12:06:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4564023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ewidentnie/pseuds/minamoto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>And somehow, this became your daily life. It’s like life in a black hole, and you know you’ll never get out.</i>
</p><p> </p><p>Or, that robot AU nishikato labor of love done for <a href="http://newsbigbang.livejournal.com/">newsbigbang</a>. Originally posted there 07.10.09; reposted on my own fic LJ on 9-10.10.09.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_With the advance of both technology and A.I., which could technically be called the same thing, the development of humanoid robots was furthered much more quickly than anyone could've imagined before. Japan, as expected, was at the forefront of these technological marvels. Eventually, both software and hardware got to the point where it was able to pass as human - or close enough to it for most people. In the spirit of Japanese naming (or, rather, bad English), they were given, at least in that country, the portmanteau name of Konpanion (made out of the butchered words for "computer" and "companion")._

_After their release, due to their unique features and desirable qualities ("Blowup dolls are nothing compared to these," one popular icon was once heard saying), Konpanions quickly became household names and fixtures._

_And this, as cliché as it sounds to say, is where it all begins._

 

Nishikido Ryo hadn’t really _wanted_ to go out and get a Konpanion, but Jin and Yamapi had said (their words) that he “was living in the 24th century and really needed to get a life because they couldn’t be around to babysit him all the time.”

And so here he was, at a relatively high-end store – you deserve a _good_ one, they’d said, if you buy a fucking bootleg or something we’ll put Nair in your shampoo – standing in front of the door and wondering, yet again, why the hell he was there.

He opens the door. The saleswoman – demure and mature, just as expected of a store like this – looks up at him and smiles. “Ah, welcome. How can I help you.”

Ryo swallows nervously. “Can I look at this season’s models?”

“Of course,” she says, getting up and guiding him to the near wall. Display models are lined up all the way down, male and female, young and old, all dressed in trendy clothes that were cut and draped to flatter the (perfect) bodies as much as possible.

He looks around, walking around from one end of the store to the other. It's interesting, seeing these life-like mannequins lined up, knowing that they could just as easily be mistaken on the street for - for someone _real_. Technology is something that's, recently, gotten pretty scary.

And nothing really appeals. He frowns. The sales lady sees it; knows what she should do. “If you’d like, there are some special models we can order in for a modest fee.”

Ryo looks at her, hesitates, and voices and agreement. She gets a binder from under her station, and they sit at a cute little table in the corner, put there specially for this purpose, as he flips through the pages slowly. The faces are all pretty – they've all been designed to be, of course they are – but still, none of them really click.

“I’m sorry,” he says, shutting the binder eventually. “Nothing’s really catching my eye.” He feels bad. He knows he probably shouldn't.

The lady is sad, she’s missed a sale. “Apologies for that, sir. Maybe you can check one of the other stores on the street?” This is Konpa-district, the streets are full of stores stocking different company’s models. Ryo’s (kind of) sure he’ll find something somewhere.

“Thank you for your time,” Ryo says. He’s about to leave when he sees one of the display models that he missed before, tucked into the front corner, looking rather…left over.

“Sorry,” he asks apologetically, “who’s this?”

The lady looks surprised. “He’s a model from last season…he didn’t really sell that well, so the display model was going to be sent back to the factory next week for reconstruction.”  
Ryo looks at him. The facial features are carefully composed into a slight smile, looking away. The Konpa feels shy. Ryo isn’t quite sure why he’s standing out to him.

“I’ll take this one,” Ryo says finally.

 

“Wait,” Jin asks in disbelief, “so out of all the hot new models that they _just_ came out with _last week_ you decided to get one from the July release. Are you fucking serious.”

Ryo sighs, for probably the billionth time. “Shut up, Jin.”

“He’s actually kind of cute,” Yamapi calls from the couch, examining the Konpa closely. “At least Ryo has some semblance of taste.”

Jin rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah – oh hey, you’re kind of right,” Jin says, looking over again. He frowns, refusing to give up. “Hey, give me the owner’s manual.” Ryo throws it at his head. “N.E.W.S. model eleven-oh-seven,” Jin reads. “Pretty advanced, good brand name…okay, so maybe it wasn’t a completely shit decision.” Ryo smirks at him. He closes the booklet. “So, you going to give him a personality?”

“Oops,” they hear Yamapi say just as Ryo’s about to ask what the hell Jin is talking about. “Too late. Jin, what’s the twelfth one?”

Jin flips through the manual quickly. “Oh,” he says, handing it over to Ryo. “Here, look for yourself.” Ryo looks at it, raises his eyebrows and sighs again.

“I hope you weren’t hoping for a docile fuck buddy or something,” Jin says.  
Ryo snorts. “As if. Why would I need one?”

“One what?” They turn and see the Konpa open his eyes – and Yamapi looking away innocently. “One what?” he asks again, leaning forward and looking at Ryo expectantly.

Ryo blinks. “Never mind.”

“Hey,” Jin whispers rather obviously, “he needs a name.”

“Yeah,” Yamapi agrees loudly, “a name.”

“How the hell am I supposed to think of something?” Ryo whispers back.

N.E.W.S. model 1107 sighs, exasperated.

 

“Okay so,” Yamapi had said, “what we’ll do is flip through the dictionary and choose whatever kanji comes up.”

“That’s a stupid idea,” Ryo said.

“I don’t see you coming up with anything better,” Yamapi sniffed.

And thus he had been named Kato Shigeaki.

“It’s kind of a stupid name,” Ryo said. “Awkward sounding, you know?”

“I kind of like it,” Kato Shigeaki interrupted thoughtfully. "I think it sounds nice."

 

“You have a nice apartment,” Shigeaki says. Ryo looks at him closely again and realizes that Shigeaki looks about seventeen, or something. He feels kind of old, and kind of creepy too, at that. He looks again and notices the sparks and circuits in Shigeaki’s eyes and realizes he doesn’t know the first thing about what the hell he’s doing. Ryo opens the manual again and figures that he might as well start from the beginning.

“There’s not really much to know,” Shigeaki says, seeing Ryo open the booklet determinedly. “You’ll learn better through experience.”

Ryo pauses at this. “How old are you?” he asks, for lack of something better to ask.

“As old as you want me to be,” Shigeaki says, laughing a little. “What about you?”

“Twenty-two.” He looks at Shigeaki, goes with his original guess of seventeen but adds on another year anyways so he doesn’t feel creepy. “We’ll say you’re eighteen, then.”

Shigeaki laughs again, probably at Ryo because that's the way his personality seems to be developing.

“That's fine with me.”

 

The doorbell rings. Shigeaki runs to get it, and is met with Jin and Yamapi jostling each other to be in front, elbowing each other in the side.

“Hi,” Yamapi says, shoving at Jin. “Um, you probably - oi, stop it - saw us the other day but anyways. I'm Yamashita Tomohisa, but call me Yamapi because everyone calls me that. This idiot - _ouch_ , that hurt, you dick - is Akanishi Jin. We’re - oof - we're taking you shopping.”

“You’re not allowed to say no,” Jin adds, stepping on Yamapi's foot. Yamapi winces. Jin is probably heavier than he looks.

Ryo shows up behind Shigeaki, probably because he heard those two (they're not the quietest people around) and frowns because this situation makes him feel like he’s supposed to. “I have work today, you know.”

Jin grins easily. “Exactly. You’d just be a drag anyways.” Ryo protests at that, something about how Shigeaki was his responsibility and he did not need his friends fucking things up. “We’ll pay,” Jin adds, “don’t worry.” They drag Shigeaki out the door – “ _I’m in my pajamas_!” “Don’t worry, we’ll get you something new to wear anyways, and I like your pajamas” – before Ryo can complain some more.

 

“You don’t have to do this,” Shigeaki says, on the light rail train to the nice shopping districts. “I don’t really need clothes.”

“You know how when like your friend or sister or something gets a kid and you kind of want to spoil them?” Yamapi asks.

Shigeaki looks mildly amused. “Um, no, not really. Can't say that's ever happened to me.”

“Well,” Yamapi replies. “it’s kind of like that.” He looks back at his phone, before grinning at Shigeaki. “You'll understand someday.”

“We really just want to make sure that you don’t get Ryo’s shitty gross cast-offs or something, because he really doesn’t have any sense of style at all,” Jin explains. "And they probably won't fit you if he did anyways, because Ryo's short and...well, you're not all that tall either, but you know what I mean. They're still shitty gross cast-offs."

Shigeaki purses his lips. “I'm probably gonna grow, you know,” he says, in that way that teenagers have that makes them sound like you've just trampled on their feelings and flung them in the nearest dumpster to decompose.

Jin grins. “Then it'll be all the more fun, that way.”

 

"Here," Yamapi says, holding a shirt out at Shigeaki, "hold this."

Shigeaki blinks, taking it. "Er. Okay." Yamapi just continues to put stuff in Shigeaki's arms. "Do you...want me to try these on?" he asks.

"If you want," Yamapi says thoughtfully. "I'm sure they'll fit you because you're standard size, right? And either way clothes look good on you, because you're lucky like that, but I guess it would be eye candy if you did, so go ahead, actually." He shoves Shigeaki towards one of the fitting rooms, who comes out periodically, looking awkward in this shirt or that jeans, to Yamapi and Jin's approving stares.

"I don't think I'd want to be your real nephew or whatever," Shigeaki says, in between the navy tee and the black skinny jeans. "I don't think I could handle it."

"I think you secretly don't mind the attention," Jin says, because Jin is really just unthinking like that.

But he's right, though. It does feel kind of nice, having people focus on you.

Shigeaki thinks he's lucky, or thinks he's lucky as much as someone with A.I. for a mind can think they're lucky.

 

“See,” Yamapi tells Shige later that day when they’re sitting at a café as Jin browses belts next door, “Ryo-chan gets lonely easily, and we can’t be around all the time. So that’s where you come in, to be there when we can't be.”

“But I can’t solve everything,” Shigeaki says – so worldly, for how young he looks. “I’m not perfect.”

“You are more than we are,” Yamapi says, sort of smiling. “Either way, you might just be what Ryo-chan needs. That’s an order, Shigeaki." He pauses. "No, Shige. That sounds better, don't you think?"

Shige looks down shyly. “I’ll try my best.”

 

Later that day, Shige realizes just exactly how much Jin wants a nephew (or something) to spoil. He didn’t realize carrying clothes could get so heavy, although to his credit Yamapi carried a lot too. Jin is just lazy. (And fat, but that's just Ryo's opinion.)

 

“Welcome back,” Ryo says absentmindedly, fumbling with something at the kitchen counter. “How was shopping?”

“It was fun,” Shige says, peeking in through the doorframe. “Your friends shop a lot.”

Ryo sighs. “They do, don’t they? It’s a wonder their closets aren’t full yet—hey, what did they get you?”

“It’s all near the couch,” Shige says. “I don’t know where to put it.” Ryo goes to the doorway of the kitchen and his eyes widen.

“Holy…what the hell, how much did they spend on you?”

“Less than I cost,” Shige says. Ryo can practically hear Jin laughing at him. He looks at Shige, still in shock. “Not that much,” Shige amends. “They know where to shop too, it seems.”

“I don’t think there’s enough space to store all those clothes,” Ryo says, still wide-eyed.

Shige looks up thoughtfully. “That could end up being a problem.”

 

“Jin,” Ryo hisses into the phone, “you are a fucking bastard.”

“Ah, Ryo-chan,” Yamapi says, after a few long seconds. “Er. Jin isn’t here right now. Well, he is, but he told me he doesn’t want to talk to you.”

“Tell Jin he’s a fucking coward,” Ryo says.

“You’re a fucking coward,” he hears Yamapi repeat away from the phone. “No, Ryo-chan said that and told me to tell you, okay, I don’t think you’re a coward—hey, Ryo-chan, Jin says you’re an idiot.”

“Tell Jin he’s an idiot too,” Ryo says. “And that he didn’t need to buy so many fricking clothes, because I think Kato has more than I do now and it’s really fucking ridiculous.”

“Ryo says that you’re an idiot and you didn’t need to buy Shige so many clothes because now he has more than Ryo-chan has himself, or something like,” Yamapi says, muffled. He waits as Jin gives him an answer. “Jin says—“

“Just give him the damn phone,” Ryo sighs. He waits. It sounds like someone dropped it on the other end. Knowing Yamapi and Jin, it was probably on purpose.

“Hi,” Jin chirps into the phone cheerily.

“Jin, you dumbshit,” Ryo growls, “he doesn’t need that many clothes!”

“Well, they looked good on him and I don’t trust your taste. What are you doing to do about it?”

Ryo can practically hear the shrug in Jin's voice. He falters, because he really doesn’t know. “I’m going to punch you in the face the next time I see you, you know that?” Ryo grumbles.

 

They end up storing all the clothes in cardboard boxes left over from when Ryo first moved into his apartment, pushed against the wall of the guest room that Kato's been using in tall stacks. Winter clothes are in the bottom boxes, and summer clothes are in the top ones.

Shigeaki calls it an inefficient system, because sooner or later it's going to be winter and at the very least he'll have to look like he's dressing appropriately for the weather. Ryo just calls it Box Mountain.

 

Ryo's job isn't really anywhere near his dream job, but it pays the rent and has not-horrible hours. He isn't quite an average nine to five salaryman (just yet?), but he isn't your average burger flipper either. He took the job because he really didn't know what he was going to do after he graduated high school, but his mom wanted him to have some stability in his life, so he hunted around some in the summer, found one that he could do (and it wasn't serving fries at the local Magnetron Burger, thank you very much) and then it just, well, happened. His job became his job, not "that thing that I took up because I really didn't have anything better to do with my life at the time".  
("But I still don't have anything better to do with my life," Ryo had once said, extremely drunk, to Yamapi. "Otherwise I still wouldn't be doing it, would I?" He woke up the morning after with a pounding headache and a sympathetic best friend. He probably could've done without both. Ryo pretends that that conversation never ever happened ever nowadays.)

Either way, his job takes up the better part of his time. It pays the bills, with more than some left over, because Ryo is a decent worker and got promoted pretty regularly and can afford a decent apartment in a decent part of Tokyo, too. He doesn't hesitate to rub it in Jin and Yamapi's faces when they're frantically flipping through all the (free) job market magazines they can find because they got laid off _again_ because that tiny, dinky little corner shop they worked at ("It'll grow," they'd always say indignantly, "you'll see!) went under. Except Yamapi and Jin then tell Ryo that even if they don't have a job they still have several centimeters of height and he doesn't, so Ryo doesn't do it as much as he'd like to.

He finds himself thinking that job security is a wonderful thing, at times.

And then he wonders just when it meant giving up everything interesting in return.

 

 _Shigeaki_ , though. Shigeaki is interesting, in good and bad senses of the word. He laughs and promises not to tell (because Jin and Yamapi would _never_ let him live it down) when Ryo shrieks, high pitched and shrill, at the realization that the back of Shigeaki's neck _pops off_ to reveal the charger port and the HDT dock hidden there. (To his credit, the marvels of technology mean that the seam line is not visible at all to the normal eye.) Ryo thinks he's accidentally broken something. Shigeaki just laughs at him some more and gently clicks it back into place.

"Please tell me if you're going to do that again," Ryo says shakily. He doesn't think he'll get used to the sight anytime soon.

"If it makes you feel better," Shige says considerately, "I can charge while you're at work."

"Please do," Ryo says. He feels like he's getting old before his time. The thought is disconcerting. "Really."

 

Shigeaki starts getting used to Ryo's routine, and as the days, weeks and months go by, Ryo comes home less and less to a Konpa jacked into the nearest wall-socket (now, he just winces lightly and goes to the other room while Shigeaki retracts the cord and puts the panel back in place) and more and more to Shigeaki reading one of Ryo's old textbooks or a free magazine that somehow got delivered to their door or watching some random program on the telescreen.

"Do you ever get bored?" Ryo asks him one day. "I mean, I don't really have the shortest job hours ever so you're stuck at home a lot, aren't you?"

"Not really," Shigeaki says thoughtfully. "I kind of go on sleep mode when you're not here, so I don't really do anything when you're away. I guess you don't notice because I reactivate quickly..."

Ryo winces. "It's kind of creepy hearing you refer to yourself as a computer," he complains. "I mean, you look like a human, you sound like a human, but you're a machine. Sometimes I just don't get it."

Shigeaki shrugs. "It's one of the laws of robotics, y'know. _A robot must always know he is a robot_. Scary shit could happen if I didn't realize that."

Ryo knows about this scary shit, kind of. He knows people who've gone through it, at the least. He doesn't think he'd like to go through this scary shit anytime soon. "But still," he protests, "could you at least tone down the computer speak a bit?"

Shigeaki looks up thoughtfully. "Well, if you want, I can download a plugin that makes me pretend as if I'm more human, somehow, I guess." No doubt he was scanning the official sites for these just a moment ago, then. He pauses and grins. "There's also a plugin if you want me to act bored, if you'd like."

Ryo doesn't even have to think about it. "I'll pass," he says. Bored, more-human-than-they-already-are robots are something he doesn't think he can deal with, ever.

 

Jin and Yamapi visit the next day while Ryo's away at work, and they're still visiting when Ryo gets back.

"I'm home," he calls out absentmindedly, taking his shoes off. Shigeaki doesn't call back, and he frowns. Glass breaks somewhere. Ryo winces. This isn't a good start to the evening.

"What did you break?" Ryo calls, walking quickly to the kitchen in socked feet. "I swear to god that if it was that cup I like..."

"Sorry, Ryo-chan," someone who definitely isn't Shigeaki calls back. "Um, we didn't mean to," Yamapi fumbles, "and it was totally all Jin's fault anyways, so-"

"No it wasn't!" Jin interrupts loudly. "You clearly dropped it before I did."

"That doesn't even make sense!" Shigeaki says, sighing in defeat.

"Hey, Jin," Ryo says, standing in the doorframe of the kitchen. "Come here for a sec, will you?"

"Okay," Jin says uncertainly, tiptoeing across the kitchen floor. "Why...?"

Ryo punches him in the face. Jin shrieks like a little girl, Yamapi starts laughing and Shigeaki just facepalms.

"Alright," Ryo says, shaking his hand out a bit, "why are you bastards here?"

 

"We figured we'd drop in," Yamapi says, as Jin sulks on the corner of the couch with a bag of frozen tiger shrimp on his face. "Since you're away at work all the time we thought Shige would be lonely, you know?"

Ryo frowns. "So you decided to use my kitchen and break my dishes?" He looks over at the remains of what once was his favourite cup. "You owe me, you know."

"It's not my fault Pi's a clumsy oaf," Jin mutters. "And you didn't have to punch me!"

"The earth's gravity was strong today, okay?" Yamapi argues. "And you were totally the one who dropped it anyways."

Ryo sighs. "I'm going to punch you too, Pi, if you keep up with this gravity bullshit." He turns to Shigeaki. "Who really dropped it?"

Shigeaki shrugs. "Sorry, I wasn't paying attention. I don't know."

"Great," Ryo groans.

"We'll make you dinner," Yamapi says placatingly. "Won't we, Jin?"

"Why should I help make dinner," Jin grumbles, "my face is going to be like majorly bruised tomorrow." Yamapi just glares at him. "Okay, okay, fine."

"Do you need help?" Shigeaki asks.

"It had better be good," Ryo warns.

 

Shigeaki can actually can cook, they all find out, much to their surprise. He's better at it than Yamapi or Jin (and probably the both of them combined, too), more efficient, faster. He doesn't spread out mixing bowls and plates of ingredients over the counters like the others do, preferring instead to keep the fuss (and the mess) to a minimum.

Eventually, he gets annoyed with Yamapi and Jin constantly getting in the way and kicks them out of the kitchen to wait with Ryo on the couch.

"I feel like I just lost a contest," Jin says mournfully. "It doesn't feel right."

"Yeah, well, you're an idiot," Yamapi sighs. "And you can't actually cook."

"I can so cook!" Jin protests.

"No, you can't," Ryo says. "We just let you think that because we're nice people."

"Fine!" Jin says, offended. "Fuck you all, I'll _learn_ to cook then. And it'll be better than your food and I'll rub it in your face - but not actually, because that would be a waste of totally awesome food _that I made_ and _then_ we'll see who can't cook!"

Yamapi and Ryo aren't particularly bothered by this challenge. "Alright," Yamapi says, and Ryo nods in agreement, because all it really means in the end is that they get free food out of it. Jin still hasn't realized this, and if they have it their way, hopefully he won't anytime soon.

 

Shigeaki calls them to dinner shortly after Jin's declaration of war. They find it all laid out neatly on the table, all vegetable dishes and chicken and steaming bowls of rice. It looks good, immaculate, even maybe perfect. Shigeaki watches them sit down, looking nervous and _young_ in the apron that Ryo never uses that's hanging loosely off his slim frame.

"Tell me how it is," Shigeaki says, "if it's not good then I can try and fix it, or something, so..."

"Don't worry," Yamapi says, smiling, "I'm sure it'll be fine. Better than someone else's, at the very least..." Jin glares at him. Ryo rolls his eyes, saying a quiet _itadakimasu~_ before picking up his chopsticks.

"What do you think?" Shigeaki asks again. He looks like he'd like to wring his hands in anticipation but won't for some reason or another.

Ryo chews slowly. "Not bad," he says thoughtfully.

And that's all that's needed for Yamapi and Jin to proceed to demolish three quarters of what's on the table.

Shigeaki smiles.

 

The news is on, but Ryo doesn't like watching the news so they watch some mundane rerun of a random game show that's on one of the other kind of sketchy channels instead.

"I didn't know how to say this earlier," Ryo says out of the blue, "but your cooking is kind of bland."

Shige looks over. This is something rather surprising, and it takes a while for his algorithms to catch up. "What do you mean?" he asks, frowning. "I followed the recipes, didn't I?"

Ryo doesn't look at him, seemingly engrossed in whatever stupid set of charades the contestants have to bullshit next. "Did you follow them exactly?"

"Of course," Shige says, letting the faintest hint of indignity creep into his tone. He's a Konpa, not a human, so he's expected to not make those kinds of mistakes on something as simple as cooking - of course he's able to (and will, unless he feels particularly vindictive that day) follow a recipe to a T.

"There's the problem," Ryo says, looking over at Shige on the other side of the couch. "That's why it tastes bland, I guess."

"How can that be?" Shige asks. He's utterly confused, and Ryo's logic - or, maybe the lack thereof - is totally lost on him. (And, honestly, he's a little offended - being told your food is bland isn't quite the best thing to hear for anyone, computer or not.)

"When we - well, humans, I guess, really - cook," Ryo starts, "the way we cook is influenced by our lives." He pauses, trying to find the right words. "I mean, the way we've lived influences the way we cook, even if we don't notice it. If we like our food spicy, we'll add a bit more than the recipe calls for without noticing. If we like our vegetables a bit softer, we'll boil it for a bit longer without realizing. Things like that, it adds up bit by bit, so eventually, we each have our own style of cooking without even noticing it. If me and Pi and Jin were to make the same recipe, it still wouldn't taste the same, because Jin likes his food a bit sweeter and Pi doesn't like spicy things and I - well, I think my food is normal, but it's still different from theirs. You know?"

Shigeaki stares. "I guess," he says. He isn't quite sure what else would be appropriate.

"Hey," Ryo says, finally turning off the TV show that neither of them are even pretending to watch at this point in time, "can you eat? I mean, I know you don't have to for obvious reasons but could you, like, taste food if you ate it and stuff?"

"I think so," Shigeaki says, "but if you want to make sure you can check the manual, I think."

Ryo rolls his eyes. "Fuck the manual, we're teaching you how to cook and I promise that by the time we're done it's still gonna be better than Jin's." He stands up. "Come on, let's go shopping."

Shigeaki just looks at him oddly, but he goes along with him anyways.

 

Unfortunately for Ryo's grand plans, all the grocery stores nearby are closed.

"So much for your great idea," Shige says sarcastically, while Ryo just glares at him and swears at the world in general some more.

 

Ryo's job is nine-to-five and then a little more somedays, and what with overtime and commute times and traffic and the occasional drink after work with colleagues and other things like that, sometimes Ryo doesn't get back until _late_. It kind of sucks, but he has regular days off and a decent amount of vacation time and hey, his apartment is ten times better than the tiny place that Jin and Yamapi share.

That's probably why they're over at his place so much, but that's not the point.

The _point_ is, his relationship with Shigeaki is starting to feel kind of like a marriage at a standstill, and sometimes he's afraid that if it goes on like this (and if he wasn't so totally awesome, and probably only if Shigeaki was a horny housewife) he's going to come home someday to find Shigeaki fucking the next door neighbour. But he knows he won't, because Konpa have better self-control than that (unless you bought one purely as a one-payment high-class live-in whore, and that kind of thing is what you go for, but that's also the kind of thing you don't tell people without a ton of alcohol first), and Konpa aren't really the type to let their libidos (do they even _have_ libidos?) take over.

But either way, if things keep on happening the way they're happening now, he's going to end up having nightmares of underage robot sex involving Kato in a dress and the next door neighbour, who is some creepy guy that Ryo doesn't really talk to ever. And Ryo doesn't really want nightmares of that at all, thank you very much, which is why he's knocking on Shigeaki's bedroom door at seven thirty on a Sunday morning.

Kato opens it after about thirty seconds, hair messed up and glaring for all he's worth (which is a lot, so his glare is super potent - luckily Ryo is positive that he can outglare anyone, robot or not, so he doesn't really give a shit). "I was _sleeping_ , Nishikido. What do you want?"

"You don't really need it," Ryo informs him. "Get dressed, we're going on a date." He pauses. "Actually, no, let me pick out your clothes, because even if Jin bought them you still have shit fashion sense." Shigeaki blushes angrily at this. "So let me get you clothes and then get dressed and then we're going on a date."

"What brought this on?" Shigeaki asks tiredly, sitting on the bed as Ryo digs through the top of Box Mountain. He tries not to laugh as Ryo finds out, horrifically and absolutely hilariously, that he's too short to really reach the top few cartons.

"I don't want to have nightmares about you in a dress fucking the next door neighbour," Ryo says grimly, not bothering to explain further as he drags one of the boxes across the room to stand on. Shigeaki just looks at him as if he's grown an extra head, and like five arms for good measure, then winces as the box Ryo's standing on collapses in on itself.

"Here we go," Ryo says, throwing a bunch of clothing at Shigeaki.

It hits him square in the face. Shigeaki picks it up off his lap with near-distaste. "If you screw up my face," he comments dryly, "there's not going to be anyone to blame except you."

Ryo rolls his eyes. "Whatever, you're nearly indestructible or something anyways. Clothing isn't going to hurt you. Come on, get dressed." Shigeaki just looks at him, and he sighs. "Fine, you wuss," he says, getting off his box (the shape is nearly unrecognizeable now) and leaving the room. "Tell me if you need help with the buttons," he says sarcastically as he leaves.

 

"So, seriously," Shigeaki says, coming out of his room as he fixes his shirt collar, "what brought this on?"

Ryo shrugs. "I figured you're getting lonely, stuck at home keeping house all day. So we're going somewhere, so be grateful, otherwise I'll break your fingers."

"You'd probably break a finger just trying to do that," Shige says. Ryo glares at him. Shige just shrugs in return. "I'm telling the truth."

"Anyways," Ryo continues pointedly, "you'd better fucking have fun otherwise I'll be pissed off. Come on, let's go."

Shigeaki shrugs again. What else can you do, when your owner (as awkward as that sounds) decides to bring you to places unknown on the pretenses of a date? He follows Ryo out of the apartment, making sure to lock the door behind him.

 

"Disneyland?" Shigeaki asks, as they catch a glimpse of it on the horizon. " _Disneyland_? Seriously?"

Ryo glares. "Shut up, it's a good place for a date."

"You're treating me like your girlfriend," Shigeaki laughs. "Sorry to say, but I'm not a teenage girl."

"Do me a favour and pretend you are for the day," Ryo says sarcastically, rolling his eyes. Shigeaki smirks and decides to do just that. "I totally had to fight to get today off, just so you know."

"Thank you," Shigeaki says, glancing over at Ryo shyly. Ryo just looks at him oddly, but figures he should probably keep his eyes on the road and doesn't really think much of it until he forgets about it five minutes later.

 

"So," Shigeaki says, grabbing Ryo's wrist lightly, "Nishikido-kun~, where do you want to go first?"

"Anywhere, I guess," Ryo says. "I don't really care."

"I've never been here before," Shigeaki says, wonderingly. "I don't know my way around very well, so please decide for me~"

Ryo looks at him kind of oddly, but chalks it up to it being a new place. "Alright, we'll go this way then.."

 

"Thank you for bringing me here, Nishikido-kun," Shigeaki says happily as they take a break in a quaint cafe that's supposed to remind people of Paris, or something. He sits with his knees in, leaning forward and smiles, tilting his head in a pleased way, eyes bright. "It's really fun!"

"It's no problem," Ryo says. Something's wrong about this, somehow. "I'm glad you're having fun," he adds, kind of awkwardly. It feels like the first date he ever had, at a small amusement park called Wonderland when he was fifteen. The girl was nice and it was fun, but in the end nothing ever really came of it and he mostly forgot about it. "Is there anywhere you want to go next?"

"I don't really know," Shigeaki says thoughtfully, "It doesn't matter, I think. I don't mind as long as you're there, Nishikido-kun~"

Ryo stares. "Um. Shigeaki, you're really starting to creep me out a little. Why the personality change?"

"What do you mean?" Shigeaki asks, looking at him demurely. "I-I don't know what you're talking about..."

Ryo stares. Shigeaki - albeit weakly - stares back. Somehow it turns into an impromptu staring contest that Ryo somehow loses.

Shigeaki bursts out laughing as soon as Ryo looks away. "Man, you should've seen your face!" he gasps out. "That was absolutely hilarious!"

"W-wait, what the hell? What's up with the fucking one-eighty? What the fuck?"

"Sorry," Shige says, in between bursts of laughter, "I had to. Sorry about that."

"Oh jesus christ," Ryo says, "you're a fucking bastard."

"Don't swear," Shigeaki says, still laughing, "there are children around."

"Here's a tip, Shigeaki," Ryo says, leaning in as well, "if you ever pretend to be a teenage girl ever again I swear to god I will do something that will be horrible and devastating and completely tragic and it will happen to you. Got that?"

"Glad to know that's not one of your kinks," Shigeaki says cheerily. He pauses. "Hey. Shige. Call me Shige."

"Why should I?" Ryo asks.

"Your friends do," Shigeaki shrugs. "You might as well, too."

Ryo considers this. "Alright," he says finally, "but call me Ryo then. None of this 'Nishikido-kun~' bullshit otherwise I'll cut your hair when you're asleep."

"It'll grow back," Shige mutters. "Alright, Nishikido-kun." He winces. "I meant Ryo. I really did, okay-"

"Don't worry," Ryo assures him, "I know a good hairdresser."

 

"I still don't think this is totally necessary," Shige says nervously, as the hairdresser wraps him in miles and miles of plastic cape. "I think my hair is fine the way it is, you know..."

"And I happen to think your hair looks like shit," Ryo says, texting someone on his 'link. "Just suck it up - at least this way, nobody'll ever mistake you for a high school girl from faraway again."

"If this is about the Disneyland thing," Shige says hurriedly, "I'm really sorry about that, you know. I hope you know that. I really didn't mean to, I-"

"Oh, shut up," Ryo says, snapping his 'link shut. "Forget about the Disneyland thing, I just think you'd look better with short hair, okay?"

Shige nods hesitantly, but still looks like he's about to cry when they start cutting his hair anyways.

 

"It's _pointy_ ," Shige says to the mirror in awe, gently patting the top of his head. "It feels so weird. Whoa."

Ryo runs his fingers through Shige's hair idly. "It suits you better," he says, nodding. "I knew I made a good decision. What do you think?"

Shige peers at his reflection some more. "...I like it," he says. "I actually kind of do." He grins at Ryo in the mirror. "Thanks. Really." He pauses, before his lips curve in a playful smile. "Nishikido-kun~"

 

"I'm home," Ryo calls as he opens the door, toeing his shoes off in the genkan.

"Welcome back," Shige calls out sleepily from the living room. "You're home early, I was taking a nap."

"Golden week starts tomorrow," Ryo informs him. "I have it off, so guess what?"

"What?" Shige asks. Ryo can see him stretch lazily from where he is now. "You have a date?"

"No," Ryo says, "although that would be better than what I have planned. I," he says importantly, "am going to teach you how to cook?"

Shige turns around on the couch and ends up looking at Ryo's stomach. He looks directly up and ends up staring right at Ryo's face.

"...do I have to?" Shige asks, shoulders slumping.

"Of course," Ryo smirks.

 

"This time," Ryo says determinedly in the car, "there is going to be at least one grocery store that's open. Just watch." Shige tries not to laugh at him but ends up failing a little at that.

Today's a lucky day though, and the good supermarket (not the sketchy one with the orange juice brands that look a little out of date and illegal) is open. Ryo drags Shige through the aisles with a malicious glee, making him push the shopping cart and snapping at him when he's slow to follow.

"I kind of hate you for this," Shige grumbles as he takes the cart around a too-tight corner and nearly tips it for the fourth time. "I fail to see the worth in this."

"You'll be making me happy," Ryo says, reaching up to get a carton of milk. Shige stands there, arms crossed, and doesn't offer to help. "Technically, that's what you're supposed to do, right?"

"Technically," Shige grumbles. "Nobody ever said anything about real-life-ically, though!"

Ryo looks over his shoulder at Shige. "It'll be fun," he says, and smiles. "I promise."

The milk carton decides to fall on his head at that point in time. They nearly get kicked out because of Ryo's swearing.

 

"What are we making?" Shige asks, as Ryo deftly lays out their day's shopping on the kitchen counter.

"Potato _nikorogashi_ ," Ryo answers, not stopping in his organizing.

Shige stares. "That's pretty easy, you know," he says slowly. "I...can already make that. Several times over. Maybe even with my eyes closed."

"Well," Ryo says, turning around, "you can cook but you can't _cook_. You know what I mean?"

"No," Shige replies, "I have absolutely no idea whatsoever what you mean."

Ryo grins. "Too bad. I always thought you were smart."

 

They really do end up making _nikorogoshi_. Or, rather, at least five different minor variations on it - Shige still doesn't get it but Ryo is insistent when he wants to be, so now Shige's sitting in front of the tiny dishes that they use to hold kimchi and other stuff during meal times each filled with a different type.

"This is stupid," Shige asks. "It's not like it really matters to me, you know?"

"It does to me," Ryo says stubbornly. "Even if _you_ don't think anything's wrong with your cooking, other people who eat it are gonna get bored. And I don't want to get bored. My life is already boring enough."

"Even with me around?" Shige asks, faking hurt. He eyes the potato chunks like they just took his lunch money and called him names. "Does it matter which one I start with?"

Ryo shakes his head. "Just go in order from one side to another." Shige looks at him warily and then at the potatoes, before picking up a piece of the one on the right first. He eats it slowly, getting used to the feeling of the systems needed to process it.

"What do you think?" Ryo asks after Shige's done swallowing.

"It's good," Shige murmurs, touching his jaw absentmindedly. "Didn't expect that."

"That's good," Ryo says noncommitally, writing something down on the lone piece of paper in the counter. "You only have...seven or so more to go, so keep at it."

 

"Which one did you like the most?" Ryo asks him at the end, while Shige's staring at the row of dishes and wondering just how long it takes you to make nikorogashi.

"I...don't know," Shige says semi-frantically. "They all taste almost the same!"

"Choose one," Ryo orders. "You don't have to tell me why - just choose!"

Shige hesitates. "That one," he say eventually, pointing to a dish third from a left.

"Alright," Ryo mutters, marking something off. "We're done for today," he says. "Remember what we've learned, okay?"

 

Ryo's cooking projects get easier and easier as the days go by. When Ryo announces that they're making rice balls, Shige nearly wants to cry out of frustration.

 

"I still don't get the point of all this!" Shige cries out suddenly in frustration after they make _popcorn_ , of all things.

"You still don't?" Ryo asks wonderingly. "And here I thought you were _supposed_ to be smart..." Shige just glares at him almost-tearfully. Ryo sighs. "Seriously? Okay, so I've been asking you which ones you liked, right? And there were definitely some you liked more than others." Shige nods slowly. "Because now you know what kinds of food you like, when you cook, you're going to do little things unconsciously that aren't in the recipe - but that's not a bad thing at all." Ryo pauses, trying to look for the right words. "It just means that you'll have your own cooking style now, really."

 

Ryo's finally run out of simple things to cook a million and two times. He declares Shige "competent" and then tells him he'll be cooking for everyone again.

"I feel vaguely like a battered housewife," Shige mutters when he hears this.

Ryo laughs. "Should I get you a frilly apron to match? I'm sure you'd look good in one."

 

It's much the same as the last meal Shige cooked for them was. Shige isn't too worried about pleasing Yamapi or Jin, they're nowhere near the word picky. It's Ryo that he's concerned about, that what he's cooked isn't good enough. He can only really taste everything in a muted way, like tasting it through a sheet of cotton (as gross as that would be), and instinctively he has _no_ idea which ones taste "good" and "bad" - his pseudo taste buds don't work the same way humans' do.  
So he's guessed. Sort of. Kind of. Either way, he _thinks_ it should have some sort of flavour.

He's just not sure if it's, well, a good one or a bad one. (Or really just if he accidentally put sugar on the potatoes instead of salt.)

 

"This is pretty good," Ryo says (with a hint of surprise in his tone, that bastard), after trying some of Shige's food.

"You think so?" Shige asks hopefully.

Ryo nods. "Yeah. Here, try some." He snags a piece of beef and some bean sprouts before motioning for Shige to open his mouth with his left hand. Shige does, and Ryo drops the food in and watches as Shige chews thoughtfully.

"Mm, I guess," Shige says after swallowing. "You really think so?"

"It's really good," Jin insists, pointing his chopsticks at Shige. "Stop being so mature, you won't get any girls that way." Shige splutters, Yamapi nods in agreement - nobody's sure about which statement, though - and Ryo just rolls his eyes. "It's really good," Jin says again for emphasis, and smiles.

 

Ryo's gotten a promotion (somehow) so he's been spending less time at home and more at the office. Shige isn't worried - they _aren't_ a married couple, despite what others may seem to think - but he does miss Ryo when he's not there.

Jin and Yamapi, on the other hand, are freshly laid-off and have lots of time to spend with him. They bring over game consoles and games, both electronic and not-electronic, and spend hours with him just playing or talking or even watching something on the TV in comfortable silence. Shige can't help but feel that they're treating him like you would a younger cousin or a nephew, but he's not going to complain. They're good friends.

Shige likes that he can call them that in his head.

 

He’s not quite sure what to call Ryo, though. Ryo is – something that is not a good friend, but probably something better than that at the same time. He likes Ryo, a lot, so he figures he’ll probably just continue to call him Ryo. Or Nishikido-kun if he feels like being creepy. It works, for now at least.

 

"I used to have a Konpa," Jin says one day, out of the blue. Ryo's at work - it's a Thursday afternoon - and Yamapi isn't there. It's odd, seeing Jin without Yamapi - in the time that Shige's known the two, which has pretty much been the exact same time that he's known Ryo for, he can count the number of times that he's seen one without the other on his hands. Maybe even on one hand.

They're both sitting on the couch staring at a blank turned-off TV. He's not quite sure why Jin is there, but he's prone to showing up randomly, without notice like that.

"Did you really?" Shige asks. He isn't quite sure what else would be appropriate to say. It would be like if a friend of yours randomly told you he had sex for the first time if you were like, fifteen and it was in the middle of a conversation about something else.

"Yeah." Jin doesn't seem to notice how awkward Shige feels, which is weird because Shige's personality is awkward by nature and he isn't really good at hiding that at all (although he tells himself that maybe he'll get better with, like, experience or something, or maybe just as he grows.) Jin stares into his bottle of ramune. "Well, I guess had isn't the right word. I never had him, I guess..."

"What do you mean?" Shige wonders. He really isn't quite sure where Jin's going with this, or really why Jin's telling him this at all. "Didn't you buy him?"

"No," Jin says, "nothing like that." He smiles kind of bitterly. "I found him in the neighbour's trash, actually. This was before I moved in with Pi and before Ryo-chan moved here, and he was just sitting there, like any homeless kid you'd find in like, the sketchy parts of town that you have to go to sometimes but you never really want to be there because you think someone's going to gank your wallet or your 'link or your shoes without you noticing, or something. And, I don't know, part of me knew he must've been there for a reason but the other part didn't care."

"Why was he in the trash?" Shige asked. "Did he crash?"

Jin shakes his head. "That wasn't it. That was never it. He was top of the line, but this was a few years ago so even then brand name had a few problems here and there. I guess he must have just glitched out, a problem with his software or wiring, or something. Nothing you could fix easily."

"What did you do when you met him?" Shige questions. He isn't quite sure where Jin's going with this story, but it's interesting, anyways.

"I should say nothing," Jin says, "but one man's treasure is another man's trash, or whatever the fuck grandmas say. I took him home." He sighs. "It was a mistake."

"What happened?" Shige asks.

"His name was Kazuya," Jin says, "or at least that's what he told me after I met him. Kamenashi Kazuya. That should've been the first sign, because I knew he was a Konpa - it wasn't obvious, but it was there. He should've been wiped if he got thrown out, should've started out blank. But I liked his name. The way he said it sounded good, I thought.

"They don't call you, if you break the law with a Konpa, did you know?" Jin asks. It's a rhetorical question, and Shige shakes his head because he wouldn't know the answer anyways. He isn't human, it's something he's always - and will always - known. "You get little red slips of paper telling you just exactly which law you're fucking over and a cease and desist. Three strikes and you're out, basically, or something like that."

"Which law was it?" Shige asks. "Um, if you don't mind me asking, that is." Nobody's ever said tact was his strong point.

"The fifth law," Jin tells him. "You know what that one is, right?"

"Of course," Shige says, slightly offended that Jin would think otherwise. " _A robot must know that it is a robot_. Of course I know, we all have to."

"Kame...Kame didn't. Or, I guess he just forgot all the laws in general." Jin pauses, trying to find his words. "I have a friend, he does Konpa repairs for a living. I took Kame to him after it all, he told me it was a glitch with his personality, with his wiring or software or something. I don't really remember. Something irreparable, kind of like brain cancer in a human or something. Either way, Kame - Kame didn't know. Didn't know that he was a Konpa. He thought he was just as human as me or - well, not you, but you know what I mean." Shige nods sympathetically. "I - he liked me. I liked him back, even though I shouldn't have, I guess. I had to turn him off, after the second warning came. Kind of killed me inside, you know?

"I guess I just kept on hoping that maybe they'd ignore me, maybe they'd overlooked him for some miracle reason. But they didn't, and...you know how the law is."

"What happened to him?" Shige asks hesitantly.

Jin shrugs. "I'm not sure. My friend said it was a wiring problem, so no matter how many times you rebooted or reset him it'd still be the same. Eventually I sent him back, I couldn't just leave him in the apartment. It just...didn't feel right."

"I'm sorry," Shige says. It feels like the right thing to say, even though it isn't.

"You kind of remind me of him," Jin says. "That's probably why I'm telling you this. Or maybe Ryo reminds me of how I was." He closes his eyes briefly. "Yeah, that's probably it."

"What do you mean?" Shige asks.

"Don't ever change," Jin says. "I don't want to see it happen again. Okay?"

And Shige nods, murmurs an agreement, because really, what else can you do?

 

Shige lets slip to Ryo about that afternoon's conversation with Jin while Ryo washes the dishes and he dries them (the dish soap does something weird to his synthskin, so he stays away from it as much as possible). He didn't quite mean to, but it happened while he tried to find things to talk about because Ryo was tired that day and didn't really feel like saying much.

"Holy shit," Ryo says in awe, after Shige recaps the entire thing to him, "Jin has fucking tough luck."

Shige winces. "That wasn't quite the way I would've put it, but yeah, I guess."

Ryo sighs. "The idiot. Falling in love with an illegal Konpa who was doomed anyways. It's just like him."

"D'you think he's still okay about it?" Shige asks, worried. He likes Jin, after all, because Jin challenges him to silly games on the Ultimet console that Ryo has on top of the TV whenever he's over, and bought him clothes and brings him places along with Yamapi when Ryo has work and is away for a while, and things like that. Jin is a nice person, as clumsy and stupid as he might be.

"Well, that's why he moved in with Yamapi, isn't it?" Ryo asks rhetorically, handing dish after dish after cup to Shige. "He won't be getting a Konpa anytime soon, though, that's for sure."

 

Winter comes before either of them really notice it. Ryo wakes up on the first day and decides to stay in bed a little longer because it's cold out.

It starts getting gradually colder, though. He spends a Sunday searching his entire apartment for the _kotatsu_ \- Shige just sits on the couch and laughs at him - finally crowing in triumph when he finds it.

It's broken, though. Ryo swears a lot at everything in general and nothing in particular after he finds this out and then goes on a search for spare blankets.

Shige, on the other hand, has his own heating system.

 

"It's cold," Ryo whines, huddled up at the foot of the couch in several blankets. He's not watching the news, or even any ridiculous game show, instead just devoting all his will into not shuddering.

"You're just a wimp," Shige says from above him where he's stretched out. Ryo thinks he's never envied Shige as much as he does right now, being able to stretch out full length and not freeze. "I'm perfectly warm."

"That's because you have your own heating system," Ryo complains. His eyes widen as a realization dawns on him. "You... _have your own heating system_."

"Congratulations," Shige says distantly, "you know one of the most obvious facts about me."

Ryo stands abruptly. "Shove over," he orders, attempting to lie down on the small sliver of couch that Shige hasn't taken up. It fails. He falls back onto the carpet, and scowls.

"Are you okay?" Shige asks, peeking over the edge in concern.

"Rugburn," Ryo answers. There's a round pink patch on his elbow where a few layers of skin have been scraped off. "It'll be fine." He stands again. "You'd better move over this time, though," he warns.

Shgie sighs, squishing closer to the edge obligingly. Ryo lies down again, sighing happily at Shige's _normal_ body temperature.

"You're really warm," he says, wrapping his legs around Shige's, the temperature change making him drowsy. It's possibly one of the most awkward positions ever, and Shige's blushing into Ryo's chest on pure instinct because of it. Ryo doesn't seem to care, though, and just settles his blankets across them both.

"You're humming," Ryo says, sounding rather sleepy.

"The processors and premptors," Shige explains. "Sorry, they can't make them any less noticeable yet..."

"Don't apologize," Ryo sniffs. "I was just stating something. It's actually pretty soothing."

"Are you going to fall asleep?" Shige asks, grinning.

"No," Ryo says. He yawns, his eyes fluttering shut gently. "Of course not."

Neither of them end up waking up until it's well past dinner time.


	2. Chapter 2

Their next spring comes with an abundance of children yelling and laughing on their way to school. It gives Ryo awful headaches, messes him up something good, so Shige tries to be extra quiet around the apartment in return.

Ryo doesn't go out to drink as much with his colleagues anymore. "Spring's a shit season to drink," he says when Shige calls him out on it. "You'd feel like a pathetic loser if you were drinking in some hole-in-the-wall in  _spring_."

He comes home early instead, watches old, Chinese-pirated movies with bad subtitles instead with Shige. They sit on the couch, or someone will be sitting at the foot of it or lying down with their feet in the other's lap.

Jin and Pi come over sometimes too. They've  _finally_  found half decent - or at least half-decent according to their mothers - employment so they don't have that much free time. It's usually a Saturday or a Friday night, and Shige's sure to cook something along with Ryo when they know Yamapi and Jin are coming. (If they don't, Pi and Jin usually end up eating leftover curry instead.)

It's during one of these sort-of-weekly visits, that Shige ends up lying with his head in Ryo's lap reading a book because the other two are hogging all the pillows. Ryo looks down halfway through the movie to ask him what he thinks and finds Shige fast asleep. He stares; he never gets to see the Konpa asleep because he  _always wakes up before Ryo gets home_  (that jerk). Considering his options, he figures he probably could wake Shige up.

He doesn't, though, and instead looks down every now again to take a peek at Shige's sleeping face. Yamapi and Jin don't notice that he always looks back up with a smile.

 

But, well, honestly - if you had to ask Shige, he would say that life with Ryo was like being married to someone but missing a lot of the steps.

If you had to ask Ryo, he'd just say it was pretty fucking convenient.

 

They go shopping together that weekend, because Ryo likes Shige's company and Shige doesn't really care (well, can't really care, if you get down to the basics of things) either way. The grocery store that Ryo's always gone to is the same as it's always been, a little chilly in the produce section and smelling of cake mix and pickled vegetables in the not-produce ones.

Shige sleeps on the way home. Ryo can practically hear the quiet hum as his processors go into hibernation, as his functions stop for the moment. He doesn't think anything of it, Shige must have forgotten to charge up fully the other day.

They get back home without event. Ryo pops the lid of the trunk, starts picking up his few plastic bags. Shige walks straight past him.

"Aren't you going to help?" Ryo asks, offended.

"Its' your food," Shige half-mumbles quietly, heading up the stairs first.

Ryo frowns, but doesn't really think anything much of it until he finds Shige collapsed in the genkan five minutes later.

 

Ryo's eyes widen in shock; the plastic bags in his hands fall to the floor with a rustling that he ignores. He rushes to Shige's side, heartbeat pounding in his ears and not even bothering to take his shoes off. The synthskin is smooth and cold under his fingertips without a power current to warm it up, and the quiet, steady, barely-there hum of Shige's processors and preemptors that he's felt before while pressed up against Shige's side isn't there at all.

He reaches blindly for his 'link and nearly drops it as he flips it open, dialing a number that he now knows by heart.

 

Yamapi's woken up from an impromptu afternoon nap (naps are  _good_  for you, he'll argue - and has argued - if anyone asks) by the obnoxious blaring of some harsh-sounding pop song from his 'link. Someone must have changed it on him while he wasn't looking. He picks it up, not bothering to look at the caller ID, and answers blearily. "Hi."

"Pi," Ryo's voice says, sounding tinny and urgent and faraway, "Pi, I don't know what to do."

"I- wha?" Yamapi asks intelligently. "Wait, what's going on?" he says, sleep-muddled and tired. "What did I miss?"

"He  _collapsed_ , Pi, and I don't know what happened or what to do or what's going on and it's really freaking me out and-"

"Calm down," Yamapi says. His brain has started working again, kind of, prompted mostly by the panic in Ryo's voice. "I'm coming over, okay? Be there in five."

"Alright," Ryo agrees shakily, "see you."

 

Ryo usually knows what to do in emergencies, but in this kind of emergency all he can think to do is move Shigeaki to the couch and flip frantically through the manual, hoping to find something that'll explain just  _what the fuck is going on_.

When Yamapi knocks on the door he doesn't hear it the first time, and nearly trips the second on his hurry to get to the door. He opens it, expecting just Yamapi but finding Jin there too.

"What's he doing here?" he asks, for lack of anything better to say.

"He knows people," Yamapi explains, jerking his head at Jin.

"I  _am_  people," Jin says, wiggling his eyebrows. Yamapi elbows him in the stomach and Ryo just looks at him in that panicky, lost way that some people get. Jin deflates a little.

"Tell me what happened," Yamapi says, as Ryo opens the door wider for him and Jin to get through and he slips his shoes off in the genkan. "Did anything strange happen before hand?"

"He slept," Ryo says, "in the car. On the way home from the grocery store. I didn't think it was odd, just thought that maybe he didn't charge up all the way earlier today, or something. And he was acting weird. Like, I don't know. Different. Tired, a little. Kind of grumpy. What do you think happened?" he asked, as Yamapi purses his lips thoughtfully. "It's something that can be fixed, right? Like, just a simple reboot or a software upgrade or a-"

"Calm  _down_ ," Yamapi says soothingly. "I'm sure it'll just be a little thing, nothing big. We'll bring him somewhere to check just to make sure, okay?"

"Where-" Ryo says, worried, "what do you mean?"

Jin snaps his 'link shut behind Yamapi. "I said I know people," he says. "He's free," he tells Yamapi. "Go put your shoes back on."

 

Yamapi carries Shige princess-style along the mostly empty (thank god, because Ryo probably wouldn't be able to deal with the weird stares they'd get, and would probably rip somebody's arm off, or something) streets because Jin is kind of fat and would probably drop him, and Ryo looks like his legs might give out anytime soon for reasons easily understandable. They follow Jin's directions, going into narrower and narrower (and sketchier and sketchier) streets until Jin tells them to stop in front of a boarded up store front that looks like it's been that way since probably World War V.

"What the hell, Jin," Ryo says, sounding like he's on the verge or laughing or crying or probably both at the same time. (In short, hysteria.) Yamapi looks at Jin disapprovingly.

Jin frowns. "Have more faith in me, guys," he says, sounding hurt, before heading round the building to the fire exit at the back. "This is the only way to get in," Jin says. "It's one of those need-to-know kind of things." He starts up the staircase, and despite the fact that it looks rusted-through in places, totally condemned (which matches the building, actually) and about to fall apart any second, Ryo starts climbing, and Yamapi, hefting Shige in his arms - the Konpa is  _light_ , it's kind of freaky - goes up too.

Jin knocks on the window on the third floor landing, peering into what looks like total darkness. It's yanked away - and the other two realize it's a blackout curtain, probably leftovers from World War V too - to reveal someone staring right back at Jin. Jin makes a face. They roll their eyes, dropping the curtain back in place before the door next to it opens.

"You should be more careful, Uebo," Jin reprimands, disapproving. "What if it wasn't me?"

Uebo rolls his eyes again. "You shouldn't be talking," he says lightly. He flicks Jin on the forehead gently. "Come on in."

The apartment, as condemned as it looks from the outside, is actually bright and kind of cozy and, most of all,  _habitable_  on the inside. Ryo sits, posture stiff, on the couch and Yamapi sets Shige down gently on it in the corner before sitting down too. Jin mostly just hangs off of Uebo's shoulder as he practically  _floats_  around the small room, setting out tea and cute little madeleines and egg rolls in a tin that might just be as old as the building.

"Make yourselves at home," Uebo says, just a little too late, as he settles into an armchair across from the couch. Jin sets himself on the arm, snagging an egg roll. "This is Uebo," he says as an introduction, taking a bite of his egg roll. He frowns. "Uebo, you have shitty snacks. You should get new ones soon."

Ueda sighs, in a way that clearly shows he's dealt with Jin and his antics before. "I'm Ueda Tatsuya." He tilts his head to the side. "You guys are...?"

"Yamashita Tomohisa," Yamapi says. "He's Nishikido Ryo. The Konpa's Kato Shigeaki."

"Model?" Uebo- _Ueda_  asks, leaning forward a little.

"N.E.W.S 1107," Ryo fills in.

Ueda smiles faintly. "Nice model. Powerful, good simulations, great aesthetics--"

"Sorry, but can we just get to the problem?" Ryo interrupts.

Ueda frowns slightly. "The problem's already happened, hasn't it?" Ryo nods, and opens his mouth to speak. "Then slow down. Since it's already happened, trying to hurry along is just going to make a mess of things. I know what I'm doing, okay?"

"He does," Jin chirps. He's moved on to the madeleines by now. "Uebo is the  _best_ ," he adds proudly.

"I'm glad you think so highly of my services," Ueda mutters dryly. He gets up, leaning on the armrest of the sofa and taking the panel off of the back of Shige's neck. Ryo doesn't even wince; at this point he's too freaked out to even notice. "Check back with me tomorrow," Ueda says, looking at the DHT port. "I'll see what I can do."

 

Yamapi and Jin crash at Ryo's apartment that night, because they are more than sure that Ryo should have - and needs - the company, and Ryo's apartment is larger.

It feels empty, without Shige to chat with idly as they mill around from spot to spot. Ryo isn't up to talking at all, Jin's toned down his chattering, partially because he doesn't have anyone else to talk to but mostly because he doesn't think it feels right to talk too much, and Pi - Pi feels like he should take care of them. He's older, at least than Ryo, and Jin's immatured rather than matured.

He picks the plastic bags off of the floor of the genkan, making a face at the dust prints it leaves behind, and brings them to the kitchen area to put them away. The milk's spoiled from being left out so long (it's a good thing Ryo doesn't drink that much - and Shige doesn't drink it at all -, Yamapi figures), and one of the small jars of pickled vegetables has cracked from being dropped. He transfers the vegetables in one of Ryo's glass food storage containers, and puts it away in the fridge along with everything else that needs to be there. At this point he's known Ryo so long that he's figured out his storage system by now. Small blessings happen everywhere.

"Want dinner?" he asks the two on the couch, staring at some Zoom-in feature about some movie about a band that came out the other day. The name was something silly, if Yamapi's remembering correctly, like Eyepatch or Gauze or - BANDAGE. That was it.

"Yes, please!" Jin says, looking up from the TV immediately. (Jin's kind of a tool like that; Yamapi learned within a week of meeting him that you could get him to do almost anything for cookies, and anything for brownies. Give him free cake and he'd give you the world.)

"Not hungry," Ryo murmurs, a stark contrast.

Yamapi frowns. "Too bad, you're eating anyways. You can't live off of 42-mag current like some people can, so go eat otherwise I'll get Jin to stuff it down your throat."

"Why can't  _you_  do it?" Jin complains. Pi throws him a look. "I mean, uh, yeah, you should totally eat. Otherwise I'll make you." A beat. "Apparently."

 

Ryo barely picks at his food at dinner, but just shoves it around his bowl with his chopsticks until it kind of looks like he's eaten something, if you don't look at it for very long and if you're across the room. Jin's constantly twisted around from his spot at the table watching the features on that BANDAGE movie ("That Natsu guy's voice is totally  _awesome_!" he'd protested, when Pi had called him out on it) to notice, but Yamapi does and starts to say something.

"So," Ryo says, loudly and just a bit awkwardly, "how'd you meet that fish-lips guy anyways?"

Jin whirls around from the TV and almost drops his chopsticks, because he's kind of a clumsy idiot like that. "You mean Uebo?"

"Yeah, whatever his name was," Ryo says. "He lives in a pretty damn sketchy place. And where the fuck did you come up with that ridiculous nickname, anyways?"

"From the same kind of place that Pi got his nickname from," Jin answers happily. "And, well, I met Uebo at a bar." Ryo snorts at this, muttering something that sounds vaguely like  _figures_. "There's totally a story behind it, though!" he protests. "Okay, so, see, when I went there, there wasn't really anyone hot there except him, but the thing is," and he pauses dramatically for effect, "I thought he was a girl. So I tried hitting on him and he just  _laughed_  at me, you know?"

"So, basically, you were an idiot," Ryo comments.

"No! No, that's not the point," Jin says hurriedly, sounding offended, "I mean, wait - no, I'm not an idiot either, but you know what I mean." ("Not really," Pi says.) "Anyways, so I tried hitting on Uebo and it went kind of okay, except then after he leaned over the counter to get a drink I kind of realized he didn't have boobs. And then I was like, 'Yo, what the hell, you're not a girl!' and then he looked at me and he was totally like 'Are you serious?' and then I was like 'But you're too pretty to be a guy!' and then he laughed at me some more. And then I was like, 'What the hell, who cares anyways?' and then we fucked."

"How was it?" Yamapi asks offhandedly, taking the last bit of beef tongue before Jin can. Ryo rolls his eyes.

"It was awesome," Jin says. "Uebo's pretty damn good in bed. Except then afterwards I kind of found out he wasn't quite human, which was kind of creepy but he was hot so I didn't mind  _too_  much."

"Wait," Ryo interrupts in shock, "he  _isn't_?"

"Well then," Yamapi says, putting more food into his bowl, "that was an unexpected plot twist."

Jin nods, wide-eyed. "Can you believe it? I mean, like, what the hell, what was he doing there by himself? It was so trippy. But yeah, Uebo's really a Konpa. I dunno why he lives by himself, or really why someone else hasn't gone and sent him back to be restructured or something, because he said something about a hardware malfunction when we first met except I was kind of drunk that night and then I was kind of hungover the next morning so I don't think I remember that too well."

"Is that legal?" Ryo asks. He finally ends up eating some of his food, distractedly. "I mean, for a Konpa to be doing...Konpa repairs."

"Uebo's good," Jin says. "And I never said anything about  _legal_ , did I?" He reaches out with his chopsticks and then stops. "Hey," he says, "who the hell took the beef tongue?" Ryo and Jin both look at Yamapi, who just sticks his tongue out at the two of them.

"Payback," Pi says, "for that time when you stole mine. You jerk. I still can't believe you did that."

 

Ryo wakes up at five forty three in the morning, in that way that one wakes up when you're too nervous about the day to come to stay asleep. He manages to stay in bed for another forty seven minutes, but eventually gives up on trying to go back to sleep and pads softly to the kitchen, grabbing a can of beer - it's too damn early for day-drinking by anyone's standards, but he feels like the alcohol would be nice - and sprawling over one end of the sofa. As soon as he sits down he realizes he doesn't want it after all, but he feels too drained to get up and put it back.

It's seven thirty before anyone else in the apartment stirs. Ryo's beer sits on the table, half-opened, leaving a neat condensation ring on the wooden surface. Yamapi comes out of the guest room - which is really just Shige's room, and has been for a long while now - yawning loudly. He stops when he sees the back of Ryo's head over the back of the couch.

"Morning," he says quietly. It feels like a quiet morning, like a morning that you shouldn't disturb with noise.

"Morning," Ryo agrees, not turning around. "Did you just get up?"

"Pretty much," Yamapi says. "Jin's still sleeping, the lazy ass. When did you wake up?"

Ryo shrugs. "A little before six, I'm not sure. Couldn't sleep so I decided to come out here."

"I see," Yamapi says. "I'll go make breakfast - what do you want?"

"No," Ryo says, getting up, "I'll make it. You go wake Jin up."

Yamapi stares at him - Ryo almost never passes up a chance for someone else to make him a meal for once - but goes back into Shige's room anyways.

Ryo, chopping vegetables calmly in the kitchen, winces when he hears the crash of Jin falling out of bed and the inevitable swearing that comes right afterwards.

 

"Alright," Jin says, nursing the bruise on his cheekbone gingerly, "what's the plan for today?"

"Eat your damn food," Ryo orders, setting a bowl of miso soup in front of him. "Then we'll figure it out."

Jin eyes it warily. "You didn't put nori in it, right? Because I kind of hate nori a lot."

"Maybe," Ryo says. "Just eat it." Jin eyes it warily, but says a quiet "thanks for the food" and tries it anyways as the other two start on theirs as well.

 

It turns out Ryo  _had_  put nori in, a fact that Jin discovered only when he stirred his soup and promptly spat it half out onto his plate and half on the table.

"That's gross," Yamapi says, pausing with his chopsticks halfway to his mouth.

"You're cleaning that up," Ryo sighs.

 

"Alright," Jin says, dropping the last paper towel in the recombiner, "what time is it right now?"

"The clock's behind you," Ryo tells him. "Look yourself."

"Alright," Jin says, looking over his shoulder, "so right now it's nine thirty in the morning and we can go check on Uebo if you want to, it's been long enough."

"Let's go," Ryo says immediately, heading towards the genkan and snagging Yamapi by the collar. "Hurry up, you lazy ass."

"My ass is lots nicer than yours, thank you very much," Jin sniffs, but follows him anyways.

 

"Are you sure this is the right way?" Ryo asks worriedly. "I don't think this is the right way. I don't remember seeing this last night. You know, if we get lost I'll kill you and dump your body in that dumpster over there and blame it on Pi."

"Why me?" Yamapi exclaims.

"You were there," Ryo answers distractedly. "This had damn well be the right way, Jin. You fatass."

"It is, it is~" Jin says, brushing off Ryo's insults. "See, it's just up ahead."

They make the climb up the rusty fire escape again - with Pi and Ryo simultaneously grimacing at the state of disrepair visible in the daylight - and they stop on the third floor. Jin knocks on the window, and frowns when there's no answer.

"...'if you're here about last night's repair, just come on in,' " Yamapi reads blankly off the note on the door. " 'If you're not, then I know tae kwon do.' "

Ryo slowly turns to stare at Jin. "You're an idiot," he says.

"It's not my fault," Jin replies, sounding hurt. He tries the door knob and it opens easily, and the three troop in quietly.

The apartment is dark, lit only with the faint blue glow of a monitor tucked away in a corner someplace. Ryo looks around for Ueda, but he's not really anywhere in sight.

"Over here," they hear Ueda call, his voice wafting through an open door. "Come on in."

 

Ueda's room - they figure it's his room, it has a bed and everything - is even darker than the rest of the apartment, save for the harsh light of a monitor on the desk, and it takes a while for the three to adjust.

Ueda's in the swivel chair in front of the desk, turned around and facing away from the screen. Shige's sitting curled up against his legs, looking exactly like he's asleep. The monitor behind him is scrolling endless, endless streams of computer code -- all ifs and whiles and fors and nors, and none of them really get it at all. It's a daunting thing, to think of those endless, endless miles of text and think that somewhere in there, there's a problem that needs to be fixed - but nobody really knows where it could be.

Ryo swallows. "How's it going?" he asks, trying to force the words past the lump in his throat that's suddenly formed. "Any news for us?"

Ueda pushes his M2D off his eyes and onto the top of his head. The code scrolling by freezes midway through the declaration of an array. "Good and bad."

Ryo feels something that he is very, very sure is akin to getting your heart and soul crushed and diced and then blended. "Tell us what's going on, then," he says. He feels like his legs are probably going to give out on him soon.

"It's fixable," Ueda says, "that's the good thing." He turns around, leaning forward and examining the screen intently. "It looks like there's a problem with some of his advanced awareness functions - the ones that let him grow, in terms of personality, intelligence and understanding. Seems like some of them might have gotten crossed up when he was manufactured, so basically...he's defected."

"Don't talk about him like that," Ryo says quietly.

"Excuse me?" Ueda asks, looking over his shoulder.

"Shige's not a machine," Ryo says. "He's not just a robot who can act like us - so don't talk about him like one!"

Ueda smiles softly, turning back to his screen. "My apologies," he says.

"How long will it take?" Ryo asks. "For him to be fixed."

Ueda turns around in surprise. "Ah, sorry, I haven't gotten to that part then. Um, the thing is, he's fixable. But it would take a while - a long while." He sets the visor back down over his eyes, and the text begins scrolling again. "Even I'm not sure of how long it'd take - it's a tricky job, because you'd have to recode all the functions from the F5 level while still preserving the memory banks and their connections."

"Give me an estimate," Ryo says. "A rough one. That's all I'm asking."

Ueda pushes the the M2D back up his forehead, spinning around in his chair. The wires twist around and he untangles them distractedly, separating them up to the point where they're plugged into the DHT splitter in the back of Shige's neck.

"Nishikido," Ueda says frankly, "at this point, your best plan would be to special order another one."

 

"Don't worry, Ryo-chan," Jin says soothingly on the quiet walk home, "I'm sure if you tell N.E.W.S, they'll be sure to do something about it - it'll be fine."

"I'm not going to," Ryo mutters.

Jin frowns. "What do you mean?"

"I'm not going to," Ryo repeats. "I'm not going to order another one."

"Why not?" Jin asks. "It's not like it'll be any different, you know. You could even choose the same personality, and every--"

"It's not the same," Ryo interrupts loudly. He sighs, in the awkward silence that follows. "Look, it just wouldn't be the same. The only reason why I even got a Konpa was because of you two, but if it's not going to be Shige, I don't see the point." Ryo shrugs helplessly.

"I still don't see the-"

"Don't push it, Jin."

 

Yamapi and Jin leave at their intersection, citing the dirty dishes that Jin left in the sink when they left the apartment the other day. Ryo nods and waves a slight goodbye, watching as the two bicker on their walk down their street.

He leaves, walking slowly and taking notice of the shops that he's always known have been there. He hasn't been in many of them before. He's not sure if he ever will, either.

"That's not cool," Shige would argue. "You have to take adventures sometimes, you know, otherwise you'd be bored out of your skull. And that's not healthy."

If Shige were here, he thinks absentmindedly, he'd probably drag Ryo around to the different stores, pointing out this and that. Telling Ryo that he should enjoy himself a little more, telling him that things like this were what made life good.

The apartment feels that much lonelier when he gets home and shuts the door behind him.

 

A week passes in this fashion.

Ryo still doesn't think he's ever going to get used to that feeling of  _emptiness_  in the apartment anytime soon.

 

"You look tired," one of his coworker says to him one day at work. "Are you getting enough sleep?"

Ryo nods. (He hasn't at all, actually.) "Yeah."

"Take care of yourself," his coworker says worriedly.

"I'll try my best," Ryo tries to say with enthusiasm.

 

Ryo gets a phone call from a phone number that he doesn't know some (a few, a lot? he's lost track) days later.

"Hello?" he asks, wary of a wrong number or a telemarketer or a "YOUR MOM IS A WRONG NUMBER" prank caller.

"Hi," a voice says. "Have you made a decision, Nishikido?"

"Who is this?" Ryo asks, frowning. He's fairly sure he hasn't signed up for any new credit cards or helped out any Nigerian princes anytime recently.

The voice sighs. "It's Ueda. Do you know what you're going to do? About Shige, I mean."

"About that. I'll call you back later," Ryo says instead of answering. He doesn't think he can at the moment. "Soon, I guess."

"Don't call," Ueda says as Ryo's about to hang up. "I won't answer. Come visit me instead. Anytime's fine."

"Why can't-" Ryo starts to ask the dial tone. He frowns, and looks at his caller ID before finally realizing that it's an IP address.

"Well, no wonder," Ryo mutters.

 

"So what are you going to do?" Yamapi asks. Jin's snoring at their feet; this isn't the first time he's fallen off the couch when drunk. Ryo stares into his beer bottle like it holds the answer to solving the square root of negative one, or something equally as impossible.

"...I don't know," Ryo admits finally. "I really don't."

"You'll have to make a decision some day," Yamapi says, absently spinning his near-empty bottle.

"I know," Ryo says, wincing as some of the alcohol splashes out messily onto his couch. "But that doesn't mean that I want to."

"If you think about it," Jin says, looking up at them blurrily - he must have just woken up, typical Jin - "there's really only one choice."

"Yeah? What's that?" Ryo asks, kicking at Jin's head for lack of anything better to do.

Jin swats Ryo's foot away easily. "You know what it is already," he says philosophically, and then takes Ryo's beer.

 

Ryo heads down the street and promises to himself over and over again in his head that he will never,  _ever_ , even if it was the last day on earth and everyone was fucked if he didn't, take directions from Jin again. He has to stop several times and squints to figure out if that mark on the back of some random receipt that Jin found in his wallet (and frankly, Ryo doesn't want to know what it was for) is a streak from the billfold's lining or a pen mark. He thinks he's gotten himself lost several times, and eventually (and inevitably) realizes he is when he finds himself in the middle of town. Which is nowhere near where he needs to be

"You look like you're lost," someone says laughingly. Ryo whirls around and is face-to-face with Ueda.

"Jin's an idiot," Ryo says by way of explanation. "Stop laughing at me."

"Where are you headed?" Ueda asks, eyes twinkling.

"None of your business," Ryo scowls. Ueda just looks at him patiently and shoves his hands in his pockets. "...your place," Ryo amends.

Ueda stops smiling. "You've decided, then?" he asks seriously.

Ryo hesitates. "...yeah," he says finally. "Yeah, I have."

 

"Do you want tea?" Ueda asks as they go in, kicking his shoes off and fluttering - for lack of a better word - around the apartment's kitchen area.

"Doesn't matter," Ryo says, bending to line up his shoes near the step. Or, really, just delaying what he knows is going to have to happen anyways.

"I'll make some then," Ueda says. The dishes clink together as he digs a cup out, and the water boiler steams as Ueda presses the button on it. Ryo stands there not quite knowing what he should do.

"He's on the couch," Ueda says finally, coming back and setting the mug on the coffee table.

"You're not drinking any?" Ryo asks in return.

Ueda smiles at him. "There's no point. Not human, remember?" He taps a temple. "There's just one last thing I need to do, so I'm gonna go to my room for a bit. Just tell me when you're done." He pads away to one of the doors leaking darkness into the room and shuts it behind him firmly.

Ryo finally steps out of the genkan, absentmindedly brushing its dust off his feet. Shige is on the couch, just as Ueda said, curled up in a corner and looking very much like a cat taking a nap.

Except Shige's not a cat, and this isn't a nap by any definition of the word.

"Hey," Ryo says quietly, sitting down awkwardly beside Shige. "I know you can't understand me, or even hear me, but... I'm going to miss you." He absently places a hand on Shige's upper thigh, tapping his fingers lightly. "At first...I didn't expect to like you all that much, I didn't expect for you to actually be part of my life. Did you know that?" The synths under his fingers give exactly as human flesh would. "But you did. And I sound like an idiot right now." He sighs. Shige doesn't stir. "I'm going to miss you so much," he whispers quietly. "Pi and Jin will too, I guess. And-" the words catch in his throat, "I guess I might kind of love you," he tries not to say.

 

Ryo knocks on the door and opens a second later to find Ueda gaming away on some MMO with his M2D over his eyes.

"I'm ready," Ryo says quietly. "I'm going to leave now, if you don't mind."

Ueda pushes the visor up. "Alright," he says, quitting the program. "I'll let you know how it goes."

He says this to an empty room.

 

"Aren't you going to ask Ueda how it went?" Yamapi asks on a walk the day after.

Ryo shakes his head. "I don't want to know," he says quietly. "He's gone, and that's the end of things. I guess he must be reconstruced into something totally different by now." He looks up at the sky. "It's funny, isn't it?" he asks. "How something that you think is so constant in your life can be gone the next day without even a warning."

"The escape velocity," Yamapi says, "for rockets is eleven kilometers per second. That's really fast, right? They have to go that fast to escape the Earth's gravity." Ryo nods, not sure at all where Yamapi's going with this or why he even knows it in the first place. "But in the end they always come back to Earth anyways."

"I still don't know what you're trying to say," Ryo says, shaking his head.

"What I'm trying to say is," Yamapi begins, "I'm sure you'll meet him again someday." Ryo looks at him in surprise, but Yamapi just smiles, ruffles his hair and runs ahead.

 

_fin._

 

 

 

 

(omake)

It's way-too-early on a Sunday morning when Ryo's doorbell rings. He gets up, the summer heat making him lazy and slips on yesterday's pants and the day before's shirt. Whoever's at the doorbell keeps on ringing it persistently.

"If you're either Jin or Pi," Ryo calls as he stumbles his way to the front door, "I gave you a key for a  _reason_!" When neither of them answer, he sighs, opening the door and expecting a telemarketer or an evangelist or the creepy neighbour from next door wanting to borrow something. He squints - the sun's in his eyes.

"Ah, I'm glad you haven't moved in the past few years," his visitor says playfully. "It would have made things so much harder if you did."

Ryo's eyes widen, trying to blink the sunspots away faster. "...holy shit," he says wonderingly. "It's you.  _It's you_ , oh my god."

Shige just laughs at him in return, holding out the white billing envelope. "It's nice to see you too - and Ueda sends his regards."

**Author's Note:**

> my original notes aren't really worth copying over, but according to them this damn thing took over half a year to write so i must've started it in march? of 2009? ...which is when signups of newsbigbang started so that actually makes sense. a large majority of it was likely written when i was away in the summer at what was basically military space camp, which is where the title and the weird shit that yamapi spouts at the end probably came from. (and also where les jours fragiles, the sort-of prequel to this, was written.)
> 
> anyway i've basically made the decision to keep most of my old stuff on either LJ/FFN in the past where it _belongs_ , but I wanted the two parts to this almost-series here on AO3 for reasons.
> 
> this one has minor edits, mostly because fifteen year old me apparently thought day-drinking at 7am was a Thing that Adults Did. (turns out yes, it is a Thing, but drunk college students at a party school are hardly Adults.) it has been kept in the original two halves that it was posted as because i think it flows a little better that way.
> 
> also check out all that setting crammed into the first two paragraphs because i couldn't write universe set-up to save my life back then :D


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